I took Boogie to watch some Indian dancing the other day. I was really excited by it because I’d actually managed to make some plans for the weekend as opposed to just seeing what turned up by the time we all managed to get dressed, but mainly because Boogie has been going nuts over our ‘Bombay Mix’ CD, forcing us to watch her perform ‘Indian’ dancing for (what feels like) hours so I thought she’d really enjoy it.
Ha ha ha.
We sat down to watch it and it quickly became apparent that she found it boring as shit to watch other people Indian dance (which will not, I fear, lead her to view us watching her efforts with even a smidgen of empathy). She fidgeted, lay prone on the floor, picked her nose, whined for a tissue, whined for a drink, whined for food, whined, essentially, to be allowed to go do something else more boring instead. To make matters worse, I found myself really enjoying it (the dancing, not the whining). After five minutes, I found myself reflecting that it was a good thing that gun ownership is not legal in this country. Had I had one I would’ve put it to her head with the command ‘Enjoy, damnit!’ such was my level of annoyance that she was resolutely refusing to play her part in making memories of attending beautiful cultural events as a child. Unless I wanted those memories to be of being as bored as shit.
I totally over-reacted. I admit it; worryingly, I could even admit it to myself whilst I was still in the process of over-reacting. So she didn’t like it. So what? She’s four. She doesn’t know her arse from her elbow most of the time. Eventually, I dragged her out of the audience none too delicately. After being quite mean and shouting at her, I handed her over to the BoogieMeister and flounced off, muttering about what a disappointment she was being. Yuk. Horrid mummy was having a moment. Purely because horrid mummy had created a moment that didn’t quite go according to plan.
The nice thing about Boogie though – because we’re still working on the development of ’empathy’ – is that she doesn’t give a shit. Flouncing off, I looked over my shoulder and she was skipping alongside the BoogieMeister with a massive grin on her face as they went off to do some flower arranging, or some such crap she’d be bored as shit of in two minutes.
Next weekend, we have no plans except to try and get dressed before noon.